January 31, 2010 - Hebrews 13:4

Today is an interesting day for me. Today is my parent's anniversary. If they had both lived, it would have been their 76th. It is also the anniversary of my second marriage. And today, I am the officiant at a wedding. Quite the day. So, it seemed appropriate that I choose a reading about marriage.

"Let marriage be held in honor by all, and let the marriage bed be kept undefiled; for God will judge fornicators and adulterers."

In fifteen days, on Valentine's Day, Chip and I would have been married 30 years. Thirty years is a long time, especially today, when people seem to marry and divorce over seemingly trivial things. It's as though the marriage vows are just something you say because they're part of the ceremony.

My first two marriages ended in divorce. The first because I was stupid and we were both just way too young. The second because of abuse, and I certainly do not believe God wants anybody to stay in a marriage that is abusive.

Chip was my third marriage. I'd grown up a lot by the time I met him. I guess perhaps I had a better grasp of the wedding vows. And when the "in sickness and in health" part came around, I was better able to deal with it. Chip was not an easy patient. He had a stubborn streak and he didn't take care of himself well. On the other hand, he could be a little too compliant. He wouldn't try until you told him to. At the end, he just didn't have any fight left.

Marriage is more than saying "I do" at the altar. It's truly meaning and making a commitment to those vows: Better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish. Every day, not just on your wedding day, but every day until death do you part.

If you are married, I encourage you to take a look at your marriage. Would you renew your vows today? Can you look at your spouse today and know that you will be together until death you do part? Cherish your loved ones while you can, because sometimes death comes way too soon.

And if you are single, I say to you...do not settle. Before you make the commitment to marriage, I encourage you to look over those vows and make sure they are ones you intend to keep. And once made, keep them. And may God bless your marriage today, and every day.